A farmer walks into a lawyer’s office. The lawyer asks, “May I help you?” The farmer says, “Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorces.” So the lawyer asks, “Well, do you have any grounds?” The farmer says, “Yeah, I got about 640 acres.” So, the lawyer says, “No, you don’t understand, do you…
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God decided that the people in Hell shouldn’t be able to see into Heaven so he had a fence constructed. The people in Hell immediately tore it down, so God had another one built and they immediately tore it down again. By now God was getting angry and decided to confront Satan and demanded that…
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Question: Why don’t sharks eat lawyers? Answer: Professional courtesy.
A guy rents a hot air balloon and gets lost so he sees another man on the ground and manoeuvres close enough to yell down to the man: “Could you tell me where I am?” The man responds, “You are at 45 degrees latitude and 54 degrees longitude.” “You must be a lawyer,” the guy…
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P = E ÷ t …what if time didn’t matter… Synopsis The novel explores a period of around 10,000 years. It begins with a group of people who had been put together for a sociological experiment who are then recruited to man a space colony ship to revolve around Venus. This happens because for a…
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A man who had been caught embezzling millions from his employer went to a lawyer seeking defense. He didn’t want to go to jail. But his lawyer told him, “Don’t worry. You’ll never have to go to jail with all that money.” And the lawyer was right. When the man was sent to prison, he…
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You’re sitting at a table with the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus and an honest lawyer and there is $5,000.00 on the table, who would get the $5,000.00? You would, the other three are fictitious characters.
A lawyer dies and goes to heaven and meets Saint Peter at the Golden Gates and protests vehemently saying that he’s only 45 and this is way before his time and he shouldn’t have died. Saint Peter looks at him and checks all of his records, looks up and says no, according to the time…
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What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the middle of the road and a dead lawyer in the middle of the road? The dead skunk has skid marks before it.
